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We’re totally guilty of doing too much at once, all while trying to manage the noise in our heads that says we’re not doing enough.

Vanessa Autrey, The Art of Balancing Burnout

Well, hello there, friends and readers. It’s been a bit, hasn’t it? Sorry about that – after I finished up the No King in Israel series, I intended to take a short break to gather some ideas for new articles, take a breather, and ultimately do some refocusing on my goals in general. Those things certainly did happen, but as part of that I got involved in some pretty demanding writing groups which, coupled with a whole hell of a lot of life things going on, ended up pushing everything on the backburner. I did my best to trek along but came to the realization that something had to give. And it did, so here I am again.

To be more specific on the writing front, I found a Discord server of published and aspiring writers and joined with the initial intent to trade finished manuscripts so that I could get more eyes on Residuum. That bore little fruit but did get some bites and I’ve been reading/critiquing what was sent my way in exchange. The critique process is slow for me, and demands a good amount of time, but I know I need readers to help me figure out where my story falls short so I’m glad for the opportunity. However, after talking with people on that server we ended up starting a “competitive accountability” session – essentially, we were to start a new work, write a certain number of chapters in a set time, post them up, read and critique every submission entered, and rank the submissions. This was a fantastic process, and one I’d started up with these people while I was still going through my post series on the site.

Those of you that know me can probably already see the issue, however. I’m not exactly a fast writer. I mull over most of my sentences, and it takes me a while to get my creative engine up and running. So, when needing to deliver four chapters a month while working a standard nine-to-five, meeting contracted writing deadlines, writing articles here, critique reading, and trying to actually be a husband and father, well… there’s just not enough time in the day.

I loathe backing out on something I’ve committed to, but I realized it had to be done. As awesome as the group was, being forced to churn out that much, especially at the complexity of story in Catalyst, was making me dread writing. My days essentially consisted of waking up, working out, going to work, getting home, writing, going to sleep. Rinse and repeat ad nauseam. My family was suffering for it, and I found myself getting annoyed when I had to go out and do anything, as it was taking away from my “productive” time. Pretty awful way to go about life, if I’m being honest.

So, I told the Competitive Accountability group that I had to drop this past week. I’m still committed to reading their submissions and critiquing, as I figure it’s the least I can do, but that freed up time is invaluable. I’ll be using it to ensure I meet contract deadlines, tighten up the story and outline of Catalyst based on their feedback, and, well, be there for my family. A much better deal all around.

Oh, and get back to writing here. As much as I was complaining earlier about being a slow, plodding writer, this site has helped turn that around. I used to be so much worse. Plus, the other half of why I started this was to try and build some kind of foundation of followers so that, in the event I finally get something published, I’ll have a base of people wanting to give that a read. I feel I’ve spent most of my time here just working to get the other aspects going and ignoring that, but that needs to change. Residuum is close to ready, and with feedback from a few more readers I’ll be set to do another edit pass and polish things off. I want people invested. Not just in that story, but in what I put out as an author. I’ll be brainstorming some ways to do that through here.

One that keeps bouncing around is adding video/audio to these. The era of blogging (or whatever this is) was over before I bothered to get into it. It’s all about building a base from relationships, and those relationships are hard to start without a real voice. I’m not exactly thrilled to go that route, but it might be a necessity.

But, if it is, I guess I’ll have to start replacing this eleven-year-old computer, huh? Oh, boy.

Anyway, glad to be back. Glad to have the time to be back. It’s nice to join the human race again.